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Forum: HoseHeads Sprint Car General Forum (go)
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Topic: Okay-A little fun here Email this topic to a friend | Subscribe to this TopicReport this Topic to Moderator
Page 1 of 2   of  26 replies
egras
April 18, 2017 at 07:59:52 PM
Joined: 08/16/2009
Posts: 3913
Reply

One of the other topics involved some fun being poked at someone calling a flat-head screwdriver a standard screw driver.  (I think they know what they meant--just said it wrong)  Made me think of metric hammers, board stretchers, the wood welder, etc. etc.  

Got me thinking about the pranks we used to pull at one of my old jobs--You know, where you send someone all over the facility looking for fictitous tools?  Anyone have any good stories out there?  

I'll give mine--which usually makes me piss myself about every time I think about it: 

I worked at Woodward Governor Company in the early 90's which made aircraft fuel controls for GE and the military.  We sent someone (an intern) all over the building, dept. to dept. looking for a set of fallopian tubes!!  We called every single dept. ahead of time and had him go through the entire building making a fool of himself.  




Paintboss
MyWebsite
April 18, 2017 at 08:25:38 PM
Joined: 12/02/2004
Posts: 2098
Reply

I have sent guys off with (2) 5 gallon buckets to bring me 10 gallons of steam. Some of them did their best to get it.

My cousin sent his wife to the service station a few years back, told her to tell them she needed the Winter air taken out replaced with Summer air in the tires.

 

 

 

 

 



pitguy14
MyWebsite
April 18, 2017 at 08:28:48 PM
Joined: 04/29/2009
Posts: 221
Reply

Not racing related, but in HS a couple guys and myself were rebuiling the football team victory bell.  It was a 100 year old relic and a prized possesion of the community.  We had it bascially torn down and the base built and was needing some longer nails to secure the column that would hold the bell in place.  We had a freshman mangaer who didn't have much in common sense.  So we sent him into town (the school was a block away from downtown) and told him to go to the hardware store to get a nail stretcher, and a left handed saw.  Naturally I called ahead to the hardware store because a cousin owned the place and let him know what we were doing and told him to play along.  Needless to say he played to the best.  The manager came back saying the store was out of nail stretchers and left handed saws, but they could have the nails sent off to be "stretched" and could have them in a few days.  We sent him to get the "stretched" nails a few days later and he was so impressed over it.  The next day we went to get a wood welder.  After asking my cousin about it, we could not contain our laghter and let him off the hook.  I don't think I've laughed so hard in all my life.  I told the manager that was his initiation and he was now apart of the team.




carol14
April 19, 2017 at 04:40:52 AM
Joined: 12/01/2004
Posts: 633
Reply

I realize this is a new string but I can't believe no one has yet sent in the story of sending in a new mechanic (or anyone new on a lot of jobs) to go to the parts department to order a gallon of "Prop Wash".   Maybe that's from the "olden days" from when airplanes had propellors.    "Prop Wash" was the air stream created from the propellors of an airplane...That was always my favorite - and many others.



Dryslick Willie
April 19, 2017 at 05:16:04 AM
Joined: 12/17/2009
Posts: 2235
Reply

I work for the local gas company, and we have crews that install and repair our underground lines.   Those crews normally use backhoes and shovels and do a good bit of digging.  Once in a while though, they either go through asphalt or concrete.    They love to get a new guy on their crews and stick him with the jackhammer and not tell him how to use it.    All you really have to do with a jackhammer is hold the thing upright, hold the blade in place with your foot, and then just let the tool do it's work that way.   It's actually quite easy.   New guys don't know that though, so they'll get up above it and try to put a lot of weight and force downward on it.    It is quite hilarious to watch these knew guys beating the tar out of themselves doing this.    How long they allow this to go on depends directly on how much they like the guy!   



larsonfan
April 19, 2017 at 07:37:26 AM
Joined: 03/24/2013
Posts: 1445
Reply

20 years of working on the flightline in the Air Force.  Used to send the new airman in the shop over to supply for "50 feet of flightline"!




Keyboard Jockey
April 19, 2017 at 08:52:19 AM
Joined: 04/16/2014
Posts: 430
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: egras on April 18 2017 at 07:59:52 PM

One of the other topics involved some fun being poked at someone calling a flat-head screwdriver a standard screw driver.  (I think they know what they meant--just said it wrong)  Made me think of metric hammers, board stretchers, the wood welder, etc. etc.  

Got me thinking about the pranks we used to pull at one of my old jobs--You know, where you send someone all over the facility looking for fictitous tools?  Anyone have any good stories out there?  

I'll give mine--which usually makes me piss myself about every time I think about it: 

I worked at Woodward Governor Company in the early 90's which made aircraft fuel controls for GE and the military.  We sent someone (an intern) all over the building, dept. to dept. looking for a set of fallopian tubes!!  We called every single dept. ahead of time and had him go through the entire building making a fool of himself.  



Working in a machine shop, we have prints that go four decimal places to the right .0001" in standard (inch). Our engineers will change the key on the bottom of the print saying the print is all metric. .0001 metric equals .00000394" in standard (inch). The machinists eyeballs will pop out of their head looking at the print. 

However we recently got a metric machine from europe which actually can machine to .0001 metric the owner of our company his eyeballs poped out of his head when he found that out. Joke is on him.



sonoranrat
April 19, 2017 at 08:58:22 AM
Joined: 11/18/2006
Posts: 417
Reply

We once sent the driver's girlfriend over to a rival's pit to borrow a left-handed, metric crescent wrench. 



blazer00
April 19, 2017 at 09:20:49 AM
Joined: 06/10/2015
Posts: 2420
Reply

I worked in a blue jean factory after high school. There was a guy there who to say the least didn't have a clue. Rather stupid, so easy to get one over on. One day he and a couple other guys were loading sewing machines on to a semi trailor and the manager asked me to log the serial numbers. They already had 5 or 6 machines loaded, so I go to the front of the trailor to get the numbers, and of course it's pretty dark. Now keep in mind....these machines were not plugged in to any power. So a buddy and I are trying to read the numbers and I winked and said....."Bob, switch the light on on the machine".  So Bob hits the switch and of course nothing happens, so I say "damn, tbe bulb is burnt out!". In a flash......the less than bright guy says "I'll go get one", and he was gone in a flash! We all got a good laugh at that one.




maddog53
April 19, 2017 at 09:23:40 AM
Joined: 03/18/2008
Posts: 1474
Reply

Sarge, Seeing that the Hawk will not be going much further in this Cup run, I see you are on the ball keeping yourself busy in other ways.  Good post



StanM
MyResults MyPressRelease
April 19, 2017 at 10:14:38 AM
Joined: 11/07/2006
Posts: 5548
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: Paintboss on April 18 2017 at 08:25:38 PM

I have sent guys off with (2) 5 gallon buckets to bring me 10 gallons of steam. Some of them did their best to get it.

My cousin sent his wife to the service station a few years back, told her to tell them she needed the Winter air taken out replaced with Summer air in the tires.

 

 

 

 

 



Worked on the catapult crew of a carrier in the 70s.  Newly assigned crewmen were routinely sent for a bucket of a team to prime the cat.  wink


Stan Meissner

StanM
MyResults MyPressRelease
April 19, 2017 at 10:15:24 AM
Joined: 11/07/2006
Posts: 5548
Reply

Steam.  Spell correct strikes again.


Stan Meissner


egras
April 19, 2017 at 10:16:58 AM
Joined: 08/16/2009
Posts: 3913
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: Keyboard Jockey on April 19 2017 at 08:52:19 AM

Working in a machine shop, we have prints that go four decimal places to the right .0001" in standard (inch). Our engineers will change the key on the bottom of the print saying the print is all metric. .0001 metric equals .00000394" in standard (inch). The machinists eyeballs will pop out of their head looking at the print. 

However we recently got a metric machine from europe which actually can machine to .0001 metric the owner of our company his eyeballs poped out of his head when he found that out. Joke is on him.



I'm a life long machinist--now college CNC instructor.  Looking at those tolerances makes my knees weak!  Smile  

 

Yes Maddog--I think Hockey is over in Chi-town so starting this post takes my mind off that!



larsonfan
April 19, 2017 at 10:47:21 AM
Joined: 03/24/2013
Posts: 1445
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: egras on April 19 2017 at 10:16:58 AM

I'm a life long machinist--now college CNC instructor.  Looking at those tolerances makes my knees weak!  Smile  

 

Yes Maddog--I think Hockey is over in Chi-town so starting this post takes my mind off that!



There's room for you guys on the Penguins bandwagon...!



91RI
April 19, 2017 at 12:26:12 PM
Joined: 03/01/2005
Posts: 277
Reply

I was a sub sailor in the Navy.  When I was a FNG, the guys sent me for 3 feet of fallopian tube.  I was a mechanics kid, so I was accustomed  to this kind of crap.  I was also a wiseass.  Rather than playing stupid and coming back an hour later saying I couldn't  find any, I had to one up the guys (bad idea for the FNG).  I went to the work bench, cut 6 feet off the roll of surgical  tubing, typed a parts ID card with a decription, quantity, navy stock number and all the proper bs on it. I then went to the engineering  lab used thier bagging material and bag sealer, and bagged it up nice and proper.  I returned to the guys and handed them bag, apologizing that we had to cut down a new 6 foot length because I couldn't  find a 3 foot length already open.  After staring in shock at the "official" nuclear grade fallopian tube I had found, and 20 seconds of stunned silence later, they dog piled the shit outta me.  I retrospect,  I should have used that 20 seconds to run and hide 




egras
April 19, 2017 at 01:29:22 PM
Joined: 08/16/2009
Posts: 3913
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: 91RI on April 19 2017 at 12:26:12 PM

I was a sub sailor in the Navy.  When I was a FNG, the guys sent me for 3 feet of fallopian tube.  I was a mechanics kid, so I was accustomed  to this kind of crap.  I was also a wiseass.  Rather than playing stupid and coming back an hour later saying I couldn't  find any, I had to one up the guys (bad idea for the FNG).  I went to the work bench, cut 6 feet off the roll of surgical  tubing, typed a parts ID card with a decription, quantity, navy stock number and all the proper bs on it. I then went to the engineering  lab used thier bagging material and bag sealer, and bagged it up nice and proper.  I returned to the guys and handed them bag, apologizing that we had to cut down a new 6 foot length because I couldn't  find a 3 foot length already open.  After staring in shock at the "official" nuclear grade fallopian tube I had found, and 20 seconds of stunned silence later, they dog piled the shit outta me.  I retrospect,  I should have used that 20 seconds to run and hide 



that is fantastic!!



maddog53
April 19, 2017 at 02:52:55 PM
Joined: 03/18/2008
Posts: 1474
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: larsonfan on April 19 2017 at 10:47:21 AM

There's room for you guys on the Penguins bandwagon...!



Ummmmmm, no Pens for me thanks.......Or the Caps if that makes you feel better lol



longtimefan
April 19, 2017 at 04:21:49 PM
Joined: 12/02/2004
Posts: 846
Reply

I am not sure what the deal is with the fallopian tubes is. They are not hard to find if you know where to look for them.




maddog53
April 19, 2017 at 04:39:52 PM
Joined: 03/18/2008
Posts: 1474
Reply
Reply to:
Posted By: longtimefan on April 19 2017 at 04:21:49 PM

I am not sure what the deal is with the fallopian tubes is. They are not hard to find if you know where to look for them.



They originated in the jungles of Fallop, where the natives found a better way to communicate with other tribes



meatbag
April 19, 2017 at 10:18:52 PM
Joined: 07/10/2007
Posts: 947
Reply

My favorite work stories for new guys in the shop...

1) new guy had to work saturday and it was only him and the quality inspector. New guy showed up late apologizing to QC guy. Said he hooked up with 2 girls night before and didn't get much sleep, it was his first 3some. He asked QC guy if he'd ever had a 3some b4 and he replied, "ya, but it was so long ago he didn't remember the 2 guys names"  It made for a long awkward day.  

2) new guy was an avid bowler and never shut up about it.  The electrician got sick of hearing about it and had someone have the new guy come ask him about his sister, (who he was told was a 3 time state bowling champion).  When asked, the electrician blew up on him and told him his sister was born with no arms (the electrician didn't even have a sister!!!)


do it in the dirt



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